Friday, December 28, 2012

Ladies! What You Must Know About What Your Man Needs." by Mark Sparks (www.MarkSparks.com) Host of The Men's Room (a seminar excerpt).

Hunt - to search for; seek; endeavor to obtain or find
         -
to make a search or quest.
         - a pursuit

         - 'in the hunt' - having a chance of success (that result keeps us in the hunt).
 

It's in a Man's nature to hunt. Whether it is for a better life or a partner. Ladies, you know this. What many of you forget is that this same necessity to hunt continues to be in his nature once he's found a partner, once he's found you. Sure his need for one manifestation of fulfilling that need (re: searching for a partner) ends but where many woman make the mistake is thinking that his nature has changed. It hasn't. We are men, we still need to hunt. Insert dreams & ambitions here. A man who is actively pursuing a goal larger than what he's already attained will continue to satisfy his need to hunt in one vital way. The other way, ladies this is where you come in, is for his partner to simulate, on her part, the same circumstances that began when the two began their dance of attraction, seduction & (hopefully) love.
You see 'letting yourself go' ladies - a term that though I'm not fond of is understood when used to encompass a plethora of actions both men & women take once they've become stagnant or as some wrongly describe it 'comfortable' in their relationship.

Side note - one should be comfortable in their relationship I'd argue from the onset or very close to it. The appearance of nerves/fear only affirms the belief that one cares at some level. Don't believe me? You remember talking to someone of the opposite sex that you had no desire for? How nervous were you then? Now think about the first times you spoke to someone which you had an incredible affinity for. Bet you were a wreck inside with nerves/fear. That's because you cared. We don't fear that which we don't care for - or a step further our fear grows as our desire to attain or  loose something does. Side note done.

So what can you do as a woman to continue to quench your man's need to hunt - allow him to hunt you. Make him again hunt you. Do some of the things that you did during the courting phase. Seduce him, yearn him, let him know he pleases you - and not just sexually. Be excited by him after time apart, send him dirty texts, hold his pursuit in high regard. I don't have to give you many examples because you know exactly what to do. Basically all the things you did to 'win' his heart in the first place.

Am I suggesting that as you grow in years that you should continue to do the things that you did when y'alls "us" was born? Indubitably! To an extent.
"But Mark our relationship has changed as the months/years have passed - that's not fair to expect that" is what I hear most at seminars when I put this idea forward. "You expect me to do my hair every time I'm going to see my husband?" Yes. Okay, not every time is my answer with a smile.
Look it sounds extraordinary but isn't that the kind of love we all deserve?! Isn't that the kind of love you deserve ladies?!
I get it, relationships transform but shouldn't they become more intimate and there for more deeply intertwined as security in love grows?
Sure it takes work but that's what keeps the relationship growing. That's what keeps us as men fully invested, and that's what keeps you as women fully invested.

Bottom line of this session is this: like you Ladies Men have hard wired needs that stay in our system until our geriatric years (and some right to old age death). If you desire to keep your man, your partner whom you love happy, if you desire to continue to grow your relationship you've got to address these needs.
And remember if it isn't growing it's dying. That's life. There is no such thing as 'staying the same'. That's called stagnant.
And love, though many things, has no room for stagnant. It's passion & desire doesn't allow it.
Thank you for your time Ladies.
Thank you for your continued support.
Any questions?

Mark Sparks is a certified practitioner of NLP, certified Conditioning specialist & host of The Men's Room a show dedicated to dating, relationships, sex and the pursuit of a higher form of male existence and excellence through conduct befitting a gentleman.





Saturday, November 17, 2012

My Way...


I stand on the colossal shoulders of the mistakes I've made, the lessons I've learned and the dreams I'm determined to make a reality. I apologize for the hurt I've caused to any but I don't take the blame for the hurt you've caused yourself. I refuse to settle, refuse to quit & refuse to use the words "I tried" as a pacifier in accepting defeat. I will continue to grow, continue to create & continue in the passionate pursuit of being love, and honing my craft. Perfection is not attainable & its pursuit brings little joy. Instead I will pursue consistent excellence in all I deem vital to the fulfillment of my purpose.
This is my Tao.




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Monday, October 15, 2012

Untitiled (A response). ©

The "courage" found in anonymity reveals either the cowardice of the messenger or their lack of belief in their message. If we've something to say worth saying - something in which we truly believe, why wouldn't we sign ourselves to our words?... In any case, if my words or my way of life offends you, I apologize:

I apologize
If I say things you don't like
I'm just sharing my opinion
I'm not looking for a fight
But my eyes are open wide
And my fists I'll hold up high
If you attack those I love
You'll see my dark side
Peaceful man
But I walk with a purpose
Are you upset
Cause I know what my worth is?
Cause I know we ain't worth less
Cause I won't accept any less
Than all that I desire?
Or is it the call to something higher?
Or maybe you just like to play with fire?
No matter
On earth
Or above
Will ever stop me
From pursuing what I love.

Wednesday, October 10, 2012

Endure. ©

Love. Relationship. Knowledge. Enlightenment. Money. Physique. Freedom.

In order to attain what the masses do not have one must passionately & lovingly execute a plan with a resolve that the masses do not display.
Simply? Yes.
Easy? Not even a little bit.

Good luck and great love on your journey, I know I take a hearty portion of both on mine.
Bless.
M.









Saturday, October 6, 2012

The Offer. ©

A poetic reiteration of a real life conversation.
Thank you for reading,
Mark Sparks

This woman stood there
Waiting for a"Let's go" response from me
Instead I replied  "I've Got A Lady"
She smiled and said "So?!"
I Said "I Love Her, So You Can Leave"
And She quickly replied "No."
I Said "Here's A happy photo Of Us & our little Fam"
She said "Oh."
I Smiled And She Finally Realize She Had To Go...
I thought I'd be sitting all alone
Then she decided to take a seat
"My name is blah blah blah blah blah
And you it is my pleasure to meet."
"Umm, thank you" I said with a half smile
Feeling where this was gonna lead
"I've actually got a lot to do
I've got this script I've got to read."
"Oh, your an actor
That makes sense cause I knew I've seen you before
But forget about tv and magazines
I would like to see more"
"I'm flattered Madame, I truly am
But there's something you need to know
I've got a lady and I've found my soul mate
So there's no place for this to go."
"But I'm only in town Like 4 times a year..."
"Umm, okay, let me be more clear.
 No way in hell am I cheating
You and me ain't gonna be
Again I've been blessed with a gem
Even a blind man could see."
"Sigh, I can't believe you're saying no
You're bent on this 'I'ma be faithful' kick,
Well understand I don't want to take your 'Queens' place
I just want to feel her King's dick."
"Alright Ms. I didn't get your name
Nor do I particularly care
Our pleasant conversation is done now
So would you kindly leave that chair."
"Pfftt, your loss" She said as she left
"But I'll see you again one day.
Oh, and for the record,
You've got one lucky lady."
I smiled and nodded as she left
If only to be polite
But the one thing that I knew more than any
Was that I couldn't wait to see my girl that night.
I got home late, after some drinks
She fell asleep on the couch
Waiting up for me
"My lady is a luck girl I thought"
As I watched her sleep,
Picked her up and carried her to bed & thought
Nah. The lucky one is me.

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Wednesday, September 19, 2012

I wish you the greatest of Joy and the deepest of Love (the depth of success). ©

Good morning to you!
I want you to know that I wish you the greatest of joy and the deepest of love, which (to me) is the deepest of success. I also want you to know that you are not an a**hole for saying "no." You are not a bad person for standing up for your rights, your space or what you believe in but that isn't a license to continually confront the world. Always remember that thinking of self first is not selfish but thinking of self only is. Never be afraid to take time to focus on self, for without filling our own cup how can we pour out for others? Above all remember hate, anger & pain may seem to propel you at the start of a new journey but know they don't serve you best. Love does. And it endures, gives joy, peace & will never fail. Love makes failure impossible. Without love as your fuel you will not make it to where you desire to be.
I wish you the greatest of joy and the deepest of Love on your adventures.
Bless,
Mark Sparks

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Tuesday, September 11, 2012

A Woman's Worth. Wasted. ©

The darkest nights
Endured with the wrong friends
Doing the unthinkable
Just trying to be relevant
Spending
Time with another one
Who don't deserve the investment
Giving up her best
For a taste of that green blessing
Hoping that it'll materialize
Into material things that'll ease the pain
A feeling born from making
The intimate a familiar thing
And though she ain't dancing on a stage
She may as well be
Cause the way she's treats herself
Has stripped away her self love and dignity
And she don't believe
That she deserves more
So she pretends to be comfortable
With being labeled a whore
She acts cool
With being 'that bitch'
But that creates half a whole
No amount of money can fix
And though she rarely alone
She's always lonely
Cause the 'I love that ass'
Is a love that's so phony
And besides that
They only call when they horny
And with none of 'em
Can she plan her life
Cause most of the dudes she with
Already have wives
So they go once they come
And she's left alone at night
Clinging to her pillow
Knowing something ain't right
And not being able
To stand the sight
Of what not who
She see's in the mirror every night
A woman she remembers
She use to knew
Who dreamed that love came with affection
And not a "G'bye" after each screw
And as she thinks about it more
It twists her up inside
'Til she can no longer hide
All those tears inside
And they stream down her face
One by one like a race...
And I wish she could see
How special she truly is
But even with that full figure
She's really just a kid
And she really needs help
But she can't see that for herself
And she just can't seem to grow
So she stays killing herself slow
Until one day
She decides to hit the gas
No more being 'that chick'
No more trading stuff for ass
So she takes a bottle of pills
And then lays lifeless on the floor
She use to think she had it all
But deep inside she wanted more
She wants to be loved
But she thinks she can't find it on earth
So her light is wasted
Snuffed out
Cause she never knew her worth




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Sunday, September 9, 2012

Mark Sparks. Acapella. © (Music Video Clip)

This is what happens when a writer (who enjoys singing) is asked to pen a song for a singer who enjoys being late to our studio sessions.
Thank you for pressing play and listening.
Bless,
M.

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Friday, August 24, 2012

"With a heart ready for prolonged battle she..." © (#LearningToLove)

"with a heart ready for prolonged battle she raised her head & lowered her guard. She knew that in him she had met her match. She knew that within his heart dwelled the real estate in which she yearned to live forever.
The moment his eyes met hers it lit something within his soul. Something primal, something extraordinary, something new. She was beautiful, he thought, but he'd tasted all sorts of beauty before. This was past carnal,  something greater. A seed planted in the earth of the garden of his very being. He walked over to her with a single intention, whether he consciously knew it in that moment or not, he walked over to unite himself with her. Forever.
"Hello." He said with a simplicity that shocked him.
Before she responded she closed her eyes & took a deep breath, allowing his scent to gently stroke her insides. She imagined his hands, his lips  tracing every goose bump on her body connecting them one by one with an invisible cord likened to the one drawing them together. She opened her eyes a moment later, which to her was an eternity, wet her lips and smiled a warmth in his direction that could not be mistaken, "Hello."...

Learning To Love.©


#LearningToLove
Coming soon.


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Thursday, August 16, 2012

"You Can't Hurry Love"... Or A little of the little I've learned 'bout Love. ©

At the end of any relationship we're left with two questions, though we get so stuck on one that we often forget the other.
                                          1. Why did it not work?
                                          2. What did I learn
(about myself, my needs, my boundaries etc...)?

Once upon a time I fell in love with a woman. So much so that I asked her to marry me. Despite things my friends, family & sober self would call "red flags" I pursued her & her heart anyways. Love is blind.
Through good times & bad I was faithful, open & vulnerable. At least to the fullest extent in which I was capable at the time.
Fast forward to now. Happy, healthy, loving my life, pursuing my dreams and single.
So what did I learn?
I learned about what I'm willing to accept and what I'm never willing to tolerate.
I learned that I'm pretty complex in a simple way and that sometimes my simple ways aren't so to those outside my Elk.
I learned what is important to me in showing me 'Love' and one of those things is my partners ability to articulate the same. I learned that I enjoy eating grilled cheese sandwiches in little chairs that are waaaay to small for me. I've also learned that sometimes walking away is the only option we have - even when we do still care.
And most I've learned that Phil Collins/The Supreme's were right and that "You Can't Hurry Love."
Honestly, you can't. "No, You just have to wait," I mean "Love don't come easy, it's a game of give and take."
Movies fool us. Love is not like the movies. Thankfully cause most don't last past 2 hours.
I also learned falling in love is the easiest part cause new love is exciting and fresh and takes little work ('cept when we wooorking, youknowwhatI'msayin'?!) but love, Real Love (sing it Mary) takes time. Even though I really Love her, Real love you just can't hurry.
With wide open eyes and a wide open heart that's what I've been blessed to learn.
We'll see how long that lasts...
Bless,
Mark


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Tuesday, August 14, 2012

Poem - No Ship. ©

Captured
Before the capsize
Realized
That floating isn't my style
No ship
I was born to fly...
I'm back.

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Monday, July 9, 2012

Waiting In Vain. ©

I feel trapped in my mind
With this one of a kind
Scenario
That makes it hard to breath
You say
You want me to stay
But you believe I'll leave
So you treat me like
I'm gone
What the hell is going on
Getting calls late on your phone
And never having enough time
To have enough time for me
It's seems plain to see
At least plain to me
That You find me most plain
And all I do is in vain
And I told You
I don't want to wait in vain
For Your love
I don't want to wait in vain
For Your love
But from the very first time
I rest my eye's on You
My heart said follow through
So I did
And I do
And I was so excited for the I do
So excited to be with You
So excited to see You shine
And I'd do anything to see You smile
And I'd give anything to help You see
But there's nothing I can do
To make You
Make You...
I can't make You Love me if you don't
Or Love me like I need to be loved
Or trust me like we need to trust
Or lust me like a man needs to feel lust
So I must Pray For God to take away this pain
Remove from my heart the strain
Cause something deep Pumps through my veins
And I cannot wait in vain
Cause:
"I don't wanna wait in vain for Your Love
I don't wanna wait in vain for Your Love..."
But with You 
I almost have no choice
Cause I will
Even though
"I don't wanna 
I don't wanna
I don't wanna
I don't wanna
I don't wanna wait in vain..."

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Monday, May 28, 2012

Why Do I Workout? ©


Why do I work out? 
Because my physical body is a vessel for my spiritual self, the physical manifestation of my desires. When I care for my body, I'm simply revealing my care for my Soul. I'm shaping my habits, proving to myself that my body is worth 4% of my day. 

Why do I work out? 
Because it's about much more than a "six pack" or a bench press max. It's affirmation that I can do what I set out to do, that I can overcome challenges and reach my goal. 

With over a decade of working with people to get what they desire and deserve and myself coming off of a couple pretty big injuries I understand that working out is a process. That getting the body we desire & deserve is a process. That we must challenge ourselves past our comfort zone in order to continue to shape our bodies but in order to do that we must first challenge ourselves past our comfort zone and continually explore our minds and hearts. You see we can NEVER get the body we desire & deserve, the life we desire & deserve until we first believe in it's possibility. Or at the very start, we must believe in our ability to be further along than we currently are & see the possibility of being somewhere en route towards our goals. As long as we believe that we are destined to be as we are, we can never become as we desire. Until we see different we cannot ever hope to be different. 

The body that we desire and deserve comes from creating habits that serve us in that pursuit. As we create habits we change and as we change we are motivated to continue to create & sustain habits that serve us in order to continue to get results. The tricky part is that this results motivation spiral can either serve us or hinder us. Meaning we get great results and continue in the direction of our desires or we get 'negative' results and continue towards the demise of our desires. 

As long as we continually examine our hearts & minds, as long as we continue to seek to answer the question "What do I truly desire?" we are on the right path. 

That's why I work out. 
Bless, 
Mark 






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Friday, May 25, 2012

Enjoy The Experience... ©

One of the fastest ways we discourage ourselves is to believe that we ought to be experts before we fully enjoy & embrace the experience. We cannot take flight until we first master walking so each step is one closer to what we desire not a punishment for not yet arriving at our destination. We can travel through and to, but we must do so one step at a time. 
In being blessed to work with people, navigating them to what they deserved and desired I have seen this phenomenon time and time again - they start at one place and expect to get to their goal in far less time than it took for them to get to where they are. What do I mean? Well, take being overweight for instance. This doesn't happen because of the one donut eaten yesterday or the  bag of chips from the day before. One doesn't put on excessive weight because they skipped one workout a week ago or a month ago. Excessive weight gain happens over a long period of time and is facilitated by a number of bad habits that one takes on. These habits don't come upon us overnight so whey should we believe that the new habits we are instituting into our lives would happen instantly. Yes, change happens in an instance for change is but a decision but that is the first step! Each day we must reinforce that decision with many other decisions - some of which are exact opposite of the habits we have built over time. It is through this conscious thought process that we are able to trade the habits that don't serve us in our pursuit of what we deserve & desire into one's that do serve us! It is through this consistent commitment to ourselves and our passion, through preparation and planning and perseverance in our execution do we create what we desire and deserve. And this all takes time so give yourself the time to change, to grow and to fully enjoy and embrace the journey for it is on the walk that we truly gain our wings.
Just sayin'... 
Bless,
Mark

**********
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Monday, May 7, 2012

Success = Understanding + Action. ©

Success in our lives, however we define it, never happens because of what we know but when we actively apply our knowledge to our actions. Understanding without application is worthless in the pursuit of success. Or in working on that summer body.

For instance, we all know that we should "eat better" and "work out". I've been a Conditioning Specialist for over a decade and I've never met a client who wanted to loose weight tell me that they thought the 3 Big Mac's a week with large fries and apple pies was serving them in reaching their weigh loss goals. But they ate them anyways.

What things do you do in your daily life that don't serve you towards getting what you desire and deserve? What habits do you have (that you may not even be aware of) that you continually work with that hindering you from getting to where you desire to be? How are you not effectively using what you know to get what you want? And the money question: what steps are you going to use to institute habits that apply your knowledge (and the knowledge of others who know how to get what you desire) to get to your desired destination?

Knowing is worthless if we aren't doing what we know. An idea unimplemented is a great thought but of little value in this world and of even less value in getting us to where we wish to be. One of the secrets to success isn't thinking of being successful (whatever that means to you) but thinking of being successful and then acting on that thought in as many ways as possible until that thought becomes your reality.

Understanding + Action = Success.
Now I've got to get to the gym...
Bless,
Mark

**********
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Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Desire: hope vs. Obsession ©

"There is but one thing in this world that I am determined to have, and that is_________________."

If we cannot answer this, to ourselves in truth & with conviction what we want is simply a wish, a hope & not a desire.

Desire to attain an end can never be a hope, or a wish but must transcend into something which closely resembles, no, is obsession! This sounds extreme when talking about going after one's goal but isn't it the way we create habits by which we live by? Isn't it how we continue to cycle of action & thought in our lives that doesn't serve us towards what we desire for ourselves?

"Obsession - the domination of one's thoughts or feelings by a persistent idea, desire, etc."
When all you can think about during the work day is getting home to sit on the couch & watch "that" show, eat "that junk food" and veg isn't that obsession?

When you are, in hopes of loosing weight, always fretting food, thinking about how clothes don't fit you, wishing that you looked different isn't that obsession?

The only difference is that in both cases the obsession don't serve towards. The second, in particular (which I've come upon countless times in my 10years+ working with clients) is actually an obsession with being 'fat' - which is the exact opposite of what is desired!

If I want my relationship with my partner to work - I must know exactly that & what that entails!
If I want my workout & diet plan to work, I must know exactly where I want my body and spirit to go & a bunch of ways to get there!
If I want to be a success in my work, I must have a measuring stick for what "success" is & continually check myself against it to ensure I'm traveling the path I need to in order to attain my definition of success!

Desire must be specific. It must move you to action which serve the purpose of the desire. But first any desired success must become the dominating thought & thus the dominating magnetization of people, places & circumstances which allow your efforts to be multiplied & your actions rewarded with the desire with which you seek.

Thoughts are things. Manage them. Protect them. Make sure they're in line with your desires & revisit them often making adjustments accordingly.
If we do, the rewards for these consistent efforts is greatness! The rewards are the attainment of the things we have dreamed for our lives!
That's something worth obsessing about, in habitual thought & action.
Blessing & joy to you on your journey.
With gratitude,
Mark.

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Monday, April 16, 2012

Thinkin About You.©

I'm sitting here thinking 'bout
How we worked out
So long ago
And got strong
Together even though
We was so different
We made an effort to make it work
I admired then
And still do now your quirks
They way you do things
You say is different than I
Yet you swear
We'd be able to survive
But our show
Though sweet
Didn't get resigned
And I'm hear
Picking up the pieces
Wondering deep in my mind
Wandering deep within my thoughts
Hoping to find an answer
Among all this loss
D'ah well
A tornado like force
Swept me up & put me down
Could've heard the weatherman's warning
Had a chance to stay dry & warm
But then I'd have missed this beautiful rainbow
That came out after the storm
Plus playing in the rain
Opened up my heart
And in part
Helped me to be whole
Filled a void in my soul
So I say thank You
As I sit here thinking about You...


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Tuesday, April 10, 2012

Poem - Ni**as In Paris (I Am Not) ©

We scream for Trayvon
Yet "Nigga's in Paris" plays on
It's a habitual thought process
We need to eradicate
In order to facilitate
The growth of our people
From subordinates
And into equals
Born with equal rights
To live, prosper and fight
For that in which we believe
Born to lead
Born to be
Greater than we are
Born to shine like stars
But instead of shining our own light
We're told to buy "bling" and shine that light
Which, we're told, makes us shine bright
But it's a dim solution
With an even dimmer future
If we keep spending our means
On things with no meaning
Cause that habitual thought process
Is the one that keeps us needing
More than we have
Fiscally, spiritually and in rights
And if we continue to fight
Each other
Kill our brothers
How are we supposed to trust one another?
I've never heard a person of Jewish decent
Speak of the holocaust as if it were anything less
Than a cataclysmic tragedy
And yet black people we
Continue to wear "nigger" like a badge of pride
Misguided
By this system
To listen
To songs that spit them
Lyrics that we take into
Our everyday language
Which we take into
Our everyday thoughts
Which we live
In our everyday actions
Which become our
Everyday actions
Nigger.
A word used to bond slaves
To take away a man's worth
To give an individual a nasty group name
Nigger
A word created out of pure hate
Made to disgrace
And separate a man or woman from who they truly are.
Nigger
A word to make the eyes not see
The lush & rich history
That a people have come from
And where we ought to strive to be.
Nigger
Wear your pants so I can see your underwear
Cause that "casual style" tells me you don't really care
And that "casual style" teaches you not to care
About your self worth cause I know
Any man worth anything to himself
Doesn't go about showing his ass while building up himself
And as a side note in jail
If you want to show off your availbility
You'd wear your pants so that other willing participants could see
Your ass
Think about that.
We are not nigga's by any stretch
Not in Paris or anywhere else
We've got to lift up ourselves
Embrace with self love
Give our own self worth a hug
Forget all the bull
And the material right now wealth
Work to take care of your family, community and self
Live by God's law
Execute your plan
Stand up black people
Cause we are descendants of Kings, Queens and survivors
I write from my heart with love but
I just need you to understand
I am no nigger
I am a proud black man.

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Thursday, March 15, 2012

We're being fooled!©

Fooled into thinking we need more when we don't even value what we already have. Fooled into investing in the meaningless instead of spending our resources on that with value.What has value? Well here's a starting list for me

1. Education (whether in our out of a traditional school)
2. Building a family & a future for them that is easier than my own
3. Learning to communicate effectively
4. Learning a new language.
5. Living the values I hold true
6. Working out
(A person cannot learn to master the soul until they first learn to master the body)
7. Learning to master my soul
8. Learning to decipher my heart.
9. Meditation.
10. Love...(learning how to more, sharing, being...)

That's a start to my list. What's yours? So here's the kicker, people tell me everyday what they want (side note I've worked with people one on one, in groups and in large gatherings during my time as a Conditioning Specialist, Coach and Paid Minister over the last 15 years. Yes I'm older than you think).

People spend countless amounts of energy hoping to convince me, and themselves that they believe what they are saying - yet they do nothing to change.

Habits rule. I don't care what you say, give me 5 minutes and I'll prove it to you. Habits make us who we are on a daily basis - not who we'd like to be or who we think we are but WHO WE ARE. And here's something I've noticd recently - we are habitually being fooled!We are fooled by media as to what "beauty is" (Sorry, big breasts and long legs just doesn't cut it!)

We are fooled by fitness folks (ummm, the 10 minute trainer, for only 10 minutes a day?! I don't think so!)

We are fooled by family and friends (you can't do that)

And most we are fooled by ourselves! Us! We fool ourselves into not going after what we (say) we so desperately desire!!! What the heck?!?!

What are your values? You ever stop and actually think about this? Okay, go ahead. Now write down 10 things you hold as values in your life (morals, beliefs, characteristics...
Go ahead, I'll wait....)

Still waiting...Still waiting for ya....Good .Now that you've got ten (you've got ten right?!) I want you to ask yourself where did these values come from. Mom & Dad? T.V? It's a scary exercise because you may find that (gasp) you don't even know why you hold something important!Phase two - of your values, which of the ten (ten right, or ten write?) do you make an effort to intertwine daily into your habit? For instance you say "being physically healthy" is one of your values, how do you habitually intergrate that into your life.... You don't you say? Well guess what, it isn't really a value of yours! Because what you value you habitually do. The end.

We are being fooled. We are fooled into believing that what we say is who we are. We are fooled into spending time & energy on things that don't matter & not on our future, our growth and the things WE SAY WE VALUE!

Deep breath Mark.... Ahhhh...Look, I'm all for fashion, heck I've walked a runway or two in my life. But fashion shouldn't come at the expense of our future, or our Children's futures. Or our dreams.Take this in:

Most of us Overestimate what can be done in a short time
(1 week, 4 weeks, 3 months)
and UNDERestimate what can be done in a longer time
(6 months, 1 year, 5 years, 10 years!)

Make a plan. Find a professional (or a group of 'em) & mentors to run your plan by. Get council (from those who have done what you set out to do) and listen to it. Find the habits of success. Oh, ignore advice cause that almost always comes from folks who tell you why it can't be done because they haven't done it/are to scared to do it/don't know what to do/never wanted to do it but wanted to say they wanted to do it (Whoa ala Joey - told you I was older than you thought.)

You want a stellar relationship? Find examples of many and learn. Don't believe 'cause your folks divorced you'll have to.You want great finances? Stop taking financial advice from people with the same amount or less money than you! And stop buying every piece of bullshit that catches your eye! (No I'm not rich but I've worked for myself for half a decade and traveled extensively doing it. A simple way to increase income is to stop having it outgoing on bullshit!)

You want to get into shape? Well put down the bag of chips/donut/starbucks lappafrappa whatever it is you keep putting in your mouth that's giving you a shape alright and get to work. You want some expert advice for free?! That's right you don't want no damn advice (good job.) Here's some council (from a former Calvin Klein Man of Steel) start walking way more and eating way less crap. And drink more gosh darn water - as in trade every beverage you drink for 30 days for water (that'll solve the bottle popping problem in the club as well!)

Blah...Blah...Blah.Bottom line? Stop being fooled. By others and mostly by self.Tell the truth, examine the truth, write a new truth that serves you more.Need help? It's what I do.
Bless,
Mark Sparks



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Wednesday, February 22, 2012

Poem - A Morning Letter To God.©

G'morning Heavenly Father
I thank You for You
For it is through You
That I can do many things
Every thing
Any thing.
Through Your breath
I am able to Be
Through Your word
I am able to see
And through Your Love
I am able to believe
It is because of Your faith
That I can have faith in myself
It's only Your grace
That allows me to forgive myself
And any body else
Sometimes I don't even know
In what I believe
Not my dreams
Not my means
Not even my own self steam
But even when I am not
Filled with faith in myself
You still are faithful
And knowing that helps
Me to believe
In all I can do
Not through my own power
But through You
With humility & gratitude
I'll take on this day
Giving thanks for the blessings
And through the challenges giving praise
For it is through the rough spots
You ready my soul
It is through the tough spots
That you really make me whole.
Again I give thanks
For all that you've already done
I look forward with faith
Sincerely,
Your Son.

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Tuesday, February 21, 2012

Poem - Free To Be Me.©

I don't think like you
I don't dream like you
So why would I act like you
Or do like you
If I'm becoming what you
Will never be?
Exactly.
I'm free to be me
An original is worth more
Than a facsimile
Than any copy
Of anybody
That I could ever be.
So I'll take council
From those who can sell
Me on the concept
That they've already taken the steps
To be
Where they want to be
And if that life
Creates fruit I like
Then, only then
Can that advice be chewed by me
But why would I choose
The game plan of one who Continues to lose
Sight for living
Out their vision
And misunderstands
That life pays what we demand?
I don't think like you
I don't dream like you
So why would I act like you
Or do like you
If I'm becoming what you
Will never be?
Exactly.
I'm blessed and so free
To be
Me.

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Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Poem - Standing At The Alter. ©

I use to be obsessed with being first.
Now, that I cannot be,
I know that I will be Your last
And know I'll never
Worry 'bout Your past
Cause without that
We wouldn't be ready to be here
Filled with love
No fear
Standing in front of God
And all the people that are here
To witness the birth of a new life
You and I
Husband and Wife
For life
Forever
I'll never
Do any of that stuff I ain't supposed to do
I'll die before I break my committment to You
True
We'll have some exploring
In the darkest parts of our souls to do
And true
We'll have some challenges to live through
But with You
I promise, I vow
To stand by You
Like I do right now
And as God as my witness
With all these people sitting here to hear this
Into our life the next chapter I dive in
Cause You're all I see
And what You mean to me
Is more than I can say standing here
So I trade You this ring
For the rest of my years
Before I kiss Your lips I need to hear two words from You:
I do.
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