Fooled into thinking we need more when we don't even value what we already have. Fooled into investing in the meaningless instead of spending our resources on that with value.What has value? Well here's a starting list for me
1. Education (whether in our out of a traditional school)
2. Building a family & a future for them that is easier than my own
3. Learning to communicate effectively
4. Learning a new language.
5. Living the values I hold true
6. Working out
(A person cannot learn to master the soul until they first learn to master the body)
7. Learning to master my soul
8. Learning to decipher my heart.
10. Love...(learning how to more, sharing, being...)
That's a start to my list. What's yours? So here's the kicker, people tell me everyday what they want (side note I've worked with people one on one, in groups and in large gatherings during my time as a Conditioning Specialist, Coach and Paid Minister over the last 15 years. Yes I'm older than you think).
People spend countless amounts of energy hoping to convince me, and themselves that they believe what they are saying - yet they do nothing to change.
Habits rule. I don't care what you say, give me 5 minutes and I'll prove it to you. Habits make us who we are on a daily basis - not who we'd like to be or who we think we are but WHO WE ARE. And here's something I've noticd recently - we are habitually being fooled!We are fooled by media as to what "beauty is" (Sorry, big breasts and long legs just doesn't cut it!)
We are fooled by fitness folks (ummm, the 10 minute trainer, for only 10 minutes a day?! I don't think so!)
We are fooled by family and friends (you can't do that)
And most we are fooled by ourselves! Us! We fool ourselves into not going after what we (say) we so desperately desire!!! What the heck?!?!
What are your values? You ever stop and actually think about this? Okay, go ahead. Now write down 10 things you hold as values in your life (morals, beliefs, characteristics...
Go ahead, I'll wait....)
Still waiting...Still waiting for ya....Good .Now that you've got ten (you've got ten right?!) I want you to ask yourself where did these values come from. Mom & Dad? T.V? It's a scary exercise because you may find that (gasp) you don't even know why you hold something important!Phase two - of your values, which of the ten (ten right, or ten write?) do you make an effort to intertwine daily into your habit? For instance you say "being physically healthy" is one of your values, how do you habitually intergrate that into your life.... You don't you say? Well guess what, it isn't really a value of yours! Because what you value you habitually do. The end.
We are being fooled. We are fooled into believing that what we say is who we are. We are fooled into spending time & energy on things that don't matter & not on our future, our growth and the things WE SAY WE VALUE!
Deep breath Mark.... Ahhhh...Look, I'm all for fashion, heck I've walked a runway or two in my life. But fashion shouldn't come at the expense of our future, or our Children's futures. Or our dreams.Take this in:
(1 week, 4 weeks, 3 months)
and UNDERestimate what can be done in a longer time
(6 months, 1 year, 5 years, 10 years!)
Make a plan. Find a professional (or a group of 'em) & mentors to run your plan by. Get council (from those who have done what you set out to do) and listen to it. Find the habits of success. Oh, ignore advice cause that almost always comes from folks who tell you why it can't be done because they haven't done it/are to scared to do it/don't know what to do/never wanted to do it but wanted to say they wanted to do it (Whoa ala Joey - told you I was older than you thought.)
You want a stellar relationship? Find examples of many and learn. Don't believe 'cause your folks divorced you'll have to.You want great finances? Stop taking financial advice from people with the same amount or less money than you! And stop buying every piece of bullshit that catches your eye! (No I'm not rich but I've worked for myself for half a decade and traveled extensively doing it. A simple way to increase income is to stop having it outgoing on bullshit!)
You want to get into shape? Well put down the bag of chips/donut/starbucks lappafrappa whatever it is you keep putting in your mouth that's giving you a shape alright and get to work. You want some expert advice for free?! That's right you don't want no damn advice (good job.) Here's some council (from a former Calvin Klein Man of Steel) start walking way more and eating way less crap. And drink more gosh darn water - as in trade every beverage you drink for 30 days for water (that'll solve the bottle popping problem in the club as well!)
Blah...Blah...Blah.Bottom line? Stop being fooled. By others and mostly by self.Tell the truth, examine the truth, write a new truth that serves you more.Need help? It's what I do.